Mackenzie Administration Commended After New Fundraising Initiative

Toronto, ON – Since the Ford government’s 2019 budget cuts to education, Mackenzie students’ learning has been impacted immensely. This week, Mackenzie school officials announced tentative plans to lease the Mackenzie computer lab to the National Aeronautics and Space Administration (NASA). As a result of the Ford budget cuts, Mackenzie admins have been scrambling to absolve some of the ever-growing school debt and this move is the latest of a series of initiatives to raise capital for the insolvent secondary school.

Known for its computationally powerful personal computers, the Mackenzie computer lab has been the shining star of Mackenzie, and is the epitome of technological innovation. The computers are well known for their outstanding ability for powerful calculations unintelligible to the human mind, such as running nearly four Google chrome tabs simultaneously and opening both a Word document and an Excel spreadsheet at the same time. Some have even claimed to have opened Adobe Photoshop.

“Mackenzie has always been a technology-orientated school,” explained Principal Johnson. “That’s why when NASA heard about our computers, they didn’t hesitate to ask for our assistance with their calculations.”

Last week, NASA conducted a preliminary assessment on the computers to get a better understanding of how much power they’ll have access to. While the plans have received near unanimous praise from TDSB teachers and officials, reactions from students have been a different matter.

“Bro, my G, no cap I be trippin’ balls yo when those NASA madlad mandems came in and interrupted my game, like bruh, literal waste yutes on God, honest, like actually not fire though,” said one disgruntled student.

While the immediate reactions from the proposed plans have certainly had a stark impact on the lives of Mackenzie students, a long term deal between NASA and Mackenzie Administration has yet to be reached.