Social media ban leads to a rise in data plan sales

'“Due to the recent social media ban by the Toronto District School Board, students are finding new and creative ways to continue to fry their dopamine receptors.'

By: #1 tiktoker

TORONTO ON - At the beginning of the 2024/2025 school year, the TDSB announced that social media use was going to be banned on school wifi. This caused many addicts go into a frenzy. “I cannot last 6 hours without checking social media!” exclaimed avid social media user, Snappy Streak.

In order to continue frying their dopamine receptors, students have now resorted to using their own personal data to check social media. This has caused a significant increase in sales of data plan companies. It was reported that $500,000,000,000,000,000 was made in profit as a result of what many are calling “the data boom”. Due to the skyrocketing demand, some students have paid-up about $80,000,000 each month on their data plan to be able to pass the tik-tok-ing of class time by insta-ntly snapping out the social media apps on their phones.

Students are constantly seeking creative ways to boost their serotonin, and although banning social media was good in theory, students have found ways to simply overcome these obstacles.